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Fantasy Football Report: Week 5

Calvin Johnson

I know what you’re thinking. Am I going to make any “Brett Favre penis jokes?” The answer is no. I’m sorry, but I think I am a little above that kind of low brow humor. Not that much above it, but still, I like to maintain a certain level of class around here.

Although, if you saw the photos, then you would realize why Favre is having trouble this season. Anyone else notice he is a lefty? Yeah, check those photos again, he’s a southpaw. So, they say football is a game of inches. Oh dammit! I couldn’t even get past the introduction!

Hey, I never said I had good self-control.

Injury Bug

  • Green Bay may be without the services of Aaron Rodgers this Sunday against Miami after the QB suffered a concussion in the Packers’ loss to Washington. Matt Flynn would start in his place.
  • You wouldn’t know that LeSean McCoy had cracked ribs with his dominant performance of 138 yds and a score on Sunday. The injury is worth monitoring, but he looks like he can play through the pain.
  • It looked like Calvin Johnson was finally putting up big numbers, but a shoulder injury could sideline him for Sunday’s game. Coach Jim Schwartz said he was “very concerned” about the injury.

Who’s Making Noise

  • Vincent Jackson’s replacement, Malcom Floyd, had a career day with 213 yds and a score. Kudos to those who took the chance and drafted him.
  • Jaguars TE Marcedes Lewis scored twice on Sunday, giving him 3 TD in the last two games and 5 on the season.
  • Who the hell is Buffalo going to throw to? Well, how about Steve Johnson? He has scored in three straight games, including two trips to the endzone on Sunday.
  • Speaking of Buffalo, QB Ryan Fitpatrick turned in another solid performance with 220 yds and 3 TD. This makes 7 TD and 2 INT in three starts.
  • Lastly, Titans WR Kenny Britt started for the injured Justin Gage and ended up leading the team in receptions and yards. Not to mention, he scored a TD for the third consecutive game.

Big Busts

  • Houston’s Arian Foster failed to break 100 total yds for the first time all season after gaining only 37 yds on 13 touches. It gets tougher this week as he faces a (now) legit Chiefs defense.
  • What the hell Greg Jennings! The man is so hot and cold this season and his 22 yds on Sunday are making me feel the chills. If Aaron Rodgers misses this week’s game, I will turn sub-zero. No, not the Mortal Kombat character…although that would be pretty cool.
  • Mark Sanchez still hasn’t thrown an interception this season, but it doesn’t excuse his 191 yds and 0 TD performance against Brett “I have the penis of a 5-yr-old” Favre on Monday night. Still, the Jets defense made Favre come up short. Oh come on, I had to!

The Curious Case of DeSean Jackson

In two games with Michael Vick starting at QB, Jackson has 8 receptions for 288 yds and 2 TD. In three games with Kevin Kolb taking the snaps, Jackson has 9 receptions for 73 yds and 0 TD.

I know I went to a state school, but even I can see that Jackson owners are praying for Vick to get back in there.

The Final Word on Week 5: Percy Harvin’s Life Just Got Sweeter

Randy Moss to the Vikings not only gives his stock some value, but now it has opened the floodgates for fellow WR Percy Harvin.

Due to the injury to Sidney Rice, Harvin was bestowed with the WR 1 job, but had not done much with the role…until Monday night. Harvin hauled in five catches for a season high 97 yds and 2 TD. Moss’ ability to draw extra defenders is going to do wonders for Harvin’s numbers and he should be a definite starter from week-to-week until further notice.

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