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Which Boston Team do you Want to Win a Championship the Most?

boston sports logos

It’s a known fact, but I’ll say it again–we the Boston sports fans have spent the past ten years swimming in championships and parades. Of course if it was up to any Boston sports fan, each of Boston’s four teams would win the championships every year. But what if you could only pick one?  Which Boston team do you want to win the championship the most?

 Bruins

 Reasons to Say Yes:

  •  Everyone loves repeat winners.
  •  Tim Thomas is the man.
  •  The Bruins can continue to make up for being continuously ignored over the past ten years.

 Reasons to Say No:

  •  I often forget that the NHL exists.
  •  If an American team wins the Stanley Cup again, Canada will seriously research the viability of a war with the U.S.A.

Celtics:Boston Celtics Logo (Image courtesy Boston Celtics)

 Reasons to Say Yes:

  • This is the last year the championship window is still open (haven’t people been saying this for three years?).  The Celtics will probably be really terrible for a long time after this season (assuming basketball is actually plated).
  • If the Celtics win, it means LeBron James didn’t.
  • The big 3 plus Rondo and company get another ring. Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen boost their chances of having their numbers retired.
  • The Celtics would be two championships ahead of L.A.

Reasons to Say No:

  • If the Celtics win a championship, the legend of Kendrick Perkins will be put to rest. We’d have no logical excuses for hating Jeff Green.
  • The Miami Heat soap opera would drag on another year.
  • Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen are fully satisfied with their careers and ride off into the sunset.

Red Sox:

Reasons to Say Yes:

  • The Red Sox are allegedly Boston’s favorite team.
  • The Red Sox would be the team of the new millennium.
  • Who doesn’t want a team of KFC eating, video game playing, alcoholics to win it all?

Reasons to Say No:

  • The totalitarian Red Sox administration receives another excuse to rule with a tyrannical fist.
  • The PR has even more leeway when it comes to destroying reputations.
  • Who wants a team of KFC eating, video game playing, alcoholics to win it all?
  • If John Lackey is out for the year, would he still get a ring?

Patriots:

Reasons to Say Yes:

  • Tom Brady solidifies his spot as not only the greatest quarterback, but as the greatest person in human history.
  • Bill Belichick appears as even more of an evil, genius mastermind than he already does. The Illuminati finally accept his application.
  • Ochocinco is guaranteed to do something crazy.
  • Somewhere in dark corner, Peyton Manning pouts.
  • There’s nothing more American than watching your favorite football team win the Super Bowl. It’s a patriotic duty.

Reasons to Say No:

  • Wes Welker feels no remorse when he bolts to the team that offers him the most money.
  • Low draft pick (The Patriots would trade down anyways.)
  • Someone from Colts management defecates in their trousers after watching the Patriots win on their turf. It sounds funny, but it would just be messy and embarrassing for all parties involved.

 My Order of Choice:

  1. Patriots
  2. Celtics
  3. Red Sox
  4. Bruins

Who would you choose?

About Josh Segal

Josh Segal is a professional shock artist and trash talker. He also occasionally writes opinion pieces about the Red Sox, Patriots, Celtics, and their respective leagues at large. Segal is currently a junior at Kenyon College where he plans to double major in drama and political science. Apparently he also writes his own biographies in the third person.

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