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The Couch Potato Report: Hoops, Cards, and Balls-a-Plenty!


Well, we’re down one hometown team, after the Bruins’ epic collapse last weekend. But have no fear, my tube-watching pals, as this weekend brings forth yet another tasty menu of TV nutrition for your eyeballs to feast on.

That’s right, it’s time for another installment of “The Couch Potato Report,” C.P.R. for your sports-lovin’ heart. Every Friday, this is where you tune into for the latest news on the hottest sports action this side of your remote. So let’s drop the gloves on the show and hit it…

#1 Celtics-Magic Game 3

When & Where Will I Find It?

Saturday at 8:30pm on ESPN

Why Should I Watch?

The C’s, led by the Big Three… scratch that… led by the Little One accompanied by the Big Three, hit the home parquet at TD Garden Saturday night, looking to jump out to a commanding 3-0 series lead over the higher-seeded Orlando Magic.

Dwight Howard and the Magic were unable to earn a win on their home court, and now they’re facing the real possibility of not getting the chance to play another home game this season. Really, the game’s going to be great and all, but you tune into this game to see what crazy antics Orlando coach Stan Van Gundy will be up to on the sidelines. That guy is a human cartoon, I just love him to pieces. He’s my favorite Van Gundy, by a sizable margin.

#2 Red Sox-Phillies

When & Where?

Friday @ 7:05 on NESN; Saturday @ 7:10 on FOX; Sunday @ 1:35 on NESN & TBS

Why Should I Watch?

It’s interleague play, woo-hoo! OK, the novelty of MLB’s interleague play has certainly worn off over the years, but still, I look forward to these AL vs. NL matchups each season. Baseball needs anything and everything to keep the game interesting to sports fans, and interleague play does a little of that… but just a little.

#3 NHL Playoffs

When & Where?

Flyers @ Canadiens, Saturday @ 3pm; Sharks @ Blackhawks, Sunday @ 3pm, both on NBC

Why Should I Watch?

For you die-hard hockey fans whose interest in the NHL didn’t get completely erased last Friday night at about 10:00, “The Peacock Network” serves up a pair of Game 4 matinees, featuring the hated Flyers against the hated Canadiens, in a good ol’ fashioned “Which Team Do I Hate Most?” matchup on Saturday, followed by a Western showdown in Chi-Town Sunday, when the ‘Hawks host the Sharks. You puckheads will be glued to your TVs, I just know it.

#4 The Byron Nelson Championship

When & Where?

Coverage on CBS, Saturday & Sunday from 3-6pm

Why Should I Watch?

I’m not really sure, actually. There aren’t any big names playing in this historic tournament… just a bunch of has-beens like Mark Calcavecchia, Corey Pavin, Brad Faxon, and Vijay Singh. That’s right, I just called Vijay a has-been, big whoop. What’s he going to do? He’s Fijian, for crying out loud… have you ever seen a Fijian fight? Exactly my point. Fijians can’t fight… now go tell your friends what you’ve learned here today.

#5 National Heads-Up Poker Championship

When & Where?

Sunday at noon on NBC

Why Should I Watch?

Ok, granted the argument whether or not poker is a legitimate “sport” remains unanswered, but nonetheless, what guy doesn’t enjoy watching the best of the best duke it out at the felt for thousands of dollars?

Sunday’s telecast features the semifinals and finals of this year’s tournament, but what you might want to tune in for is to get a look at the tournament’s host, the lovely Miss Leeann Tweeden. Personally, I wouldn’t mind going “all in” with my “chip stack,” if you know what I mean… and I think you do.

This Week’s “Off the Field” Pick: “Lost” Series Finale

When & Where?

ABC, Sunday night from 7-11pm

Why Should I Watch?

I’ll be honest, I’ve never seen a single minute of this show. I didn’t get into it from the start, and it just seemed like one of those shows that’d be tough to jump into mid-stream, you know? But anyway, “Lost” has been a TV phenomenon since its inception, and now after six seasons, fans will be served up their last dish of their island-dwelling buddies. The main event begins at 7pm, with two hours of behind-the-scenes footage, series retrospectives and interviews, all leading up to the two-hour series finale at 9pm.

Personally, you’re probably more likely to catch me checking out the many other options on TV Sunday night, like Yanks-Mets on ESPN, the season finale of “Family Guy” on Fox, or engulfed in the day-long “Law & Order: SVU” marathon on USA, but for you Lost fanatics, consider Sunday night your main event. For your sake, I hope it doesn’t end with “Don’t Stop Believing,” by Journey. I mean really, what kind of TV classic would end like that, right?

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