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The 2012 season is about a month old and already two things are very clear: I miss last year’s bullpen and last year’s “sideline” reporter.
Sorry folks, but Jenny Dell is not really doing it for me. I know, I know, the women reading this are calling me a superficial pig and the fellas reading this are wondering if I’d prefer the dude from Twilight as the field reporter.
I’m just picky, that’s all. I liked Heidi Watney. I liked Heidi, a lot. Most of the Red Sox fans (and players) did as well. She was obviously pretty and she had a ton of personality. But, now, she’s gone and in her place is 2008 Umass Amherst graduate, Jenny Dell.
Her prior experience as a sideline journalist is for ESPN, reporting on the X-games or bowling or some stupid thing. Regardless of what her job was prior, the former Umass cheerleader has replaced the former Miss San Diego for the 2012 season and I’m not impressed.
It’s the honest truth that most guys aren’t really judging these sideline reporters based on what they are saying anyway. The sideline reporter very rarely tells the viewer anything they need to know or anything that they didn’t already know in the first place. You really don’t need one.
I mean, what does a sideline reporter do? They get a quick interview with a player or the manager after the game, ask softball questions and then that player will go on to have a press conference anyway and answer those same questions. Complete waste of time.
But, at some point, marketing people decided that because of the male sports demographic, teams could easily benefit from some sort of female presence. It’s all about eye candy. It helps sell the pregame show. It works too.
I watched every pre-game show, tricked by the siren song of Tina Cervasio and Heidi Watney, only to hear information I already knew. Sorry if you have problem with this, but they are sort of a mousetrap in many ways. The allurements of a pretty face can and will always help a network.
I understand that this is Boston and every guy in the city fawns over any chick who can talk about baseball. But let’s be honest here, please. Of course, Jenny Dell is beyond pretty. It’s not hard to admit that she’s damn pretty, ok, just check out those pics online of her dressed up as Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz or Wonder Woman while she was attending UMass Amherst. They’ll drive you nuts.
But since this isn’t Barstool Sports, I’m not required by law to write a 1,000-word article about her camel toe. I actually want to critique the young woman’s performance and not just her looks. There’s probably already a bunch of diehard fans (stalkers) who unconditionally love her (send her hair/ask her for her used socks), but not me.
I’ll give her time – it’s only fair – but right now, I’m not a fan. From what I’ve seen, she’s coming off as overly rehearsed. You need some degree of magnetism do to this job. She doesn’t stand out much and right now, she’s really rigid in her mannerisms and reporting. She’s actually coming off as a little boring. She’s not letting her personality and her natural charm (which I’m sure she possesses) take over.
Heidi and Tina won me over with her entrancing disposition, and Hazel Mae won me over with how knowledgeable she was. So, my advice to Jenny Dull…I mean Dell, is to just relax. It’s not enough to just repeat the words you memorized. You have to add a little grace and allurement to your words.
Make yourself at home, Jenny, and pretend like you’re back at “zoo mass” and you’re the center of attention
at some out-of-control party (riot).